The breakup I will share with you shattered me to my core. It wasn’t just the end of a relationship; it felt like the end of the world. The pain was so intense that it was hard to imagine a day I’d be whole again. I had lost all hope of ever rediscovering myself. But as they say, life goes on, and so should you. Within the wreckage of my heart, I found the most profound lessons of my life.
I’ll never forget the moment when it all fell apart. Her words seemed to hang in the air, heavy and irreversible. My world crumbled, and the tears flowed like a river. The emptiness that followed was a void I couldn’t fill. Countless analyses and dissections of what happened, why it happened, where my faults were, where my partner (ex) was not right- everything came crashing on me. I was left to pick up the pieces of myself from the debris of ‘love’ that seemed to have been lost on me.
I had to move on. If not, I had to live with it. I couldn’t continue to wallow in self-misery. So, I sat with my feelings, went to therapy, sought closure from my ex (although in vain), and tried to win them back. But I knew the reality had changed. I was no longer committed to someone I loved and the one who loved me, too. I had to accept that.
Amid this chaos, I discovered that acceptance wasn’t a one-time event but a process. It wasn’t about denying my pain; it was about acknowledging it. There were days when I couldn’t get out of bed, which was okay. The healing journey started with allowing myself to grieve. And boy, did I grieve! My sister and best friend practically had to pull me out of my self-destruction mode.
As the days turned into weeks and the weeks into months, I started to piece myself back together. I rekindled my love for painting, dancing, singing, writing, and more! Long walks in the park, reconnecting with nature, and working out became my daily routine. Gradually, but surely, I became closer to my needs, wants, and myself.
Self-love became my lifeline. I practised self-compassion, nurturing my wounded soul. I would treat myself to small indulgences, like a warm cup of tea on a rainy day. The more I loved and cared for myself, the more I attracted positivity into my life. And no, it was not easy. There were still days when I wanted to cry, so I would. Sometimes, I felt nothing but lost and couldn’t find the light. But there was always another day. A new morning.
Letting go of resentment was a Herculean task. It took time and self-reflection. I realised that holding onto anger only kept me trapped in the past. I was angry, hurt, and sad. My sense of self was lost. But it was not my way of living. I reflected on what was triggering me and decided to let go. It was a process, not an event, and with each step, I felt lighter. I learned that I wouldn’t abandon myself like that for anyone.
Sharing my story with others was terrifying. I felt exposed and fragile. Sometimes, I felt judged and ignored. But I also felt a deep connection with those who had experienced similar pain. Being vulnerable allowed me to connect profoundly, and I discovered the strength that comes from authenticity.
The breakup eventually became a catalyst for transformation. I discovered a new passion – helping others navigate the complexities of relationships. My journey led me to become a relationship coach, a role I never imagined for myself.
My breakup was more than just an ending; it was a rebirth. The pain and heartache were the crucible in which I found my strength, resilience, and true self. Today, as a relationship coach, I’m committed to helping others heal and grow after heartbreak. I want to inspire you to see that there’s a flicker of hope even in the darkest times. Your journey may be painful, but it is also a path to self-discovery and transformation. Embrace it.
